Last week for my thankfulness list I turned to my new Listography book, thinking what a great source of reasons to be thankful. Well...my husband has pointed out that I probably did not do enough research to make such a broad sweeping statement...there are some lists here that you are better off not knowing about me.
Such as: List the Strangest Places You've Had Sex
List Your Past Lovers
List People You Wouldn't Mind Having Sex With
List Your Favorite Sexual Fantasies
Notice the subject matter on these few I would not share...there is a trend there. But there are lots of pages here that will be fun to share with you. I am a bit of a 'list nut' so this is easy.
List Your Biggest Fears
1. Right now my biggest fear seems to be not completing my Sketchbook Project I am doing with the Brooklyn Art Library which has to be submitted by January 15, 2011. Every day I am working on a sketch for the book and in 30 more days +/- I should be finished and have it in the mail. Christmas will have to be on hold until I have that under control!
2. My life will come to an end and I fear that I will have not accomplished what I think should have been done with all the time I have been given.
3. It doesn't seem to me that I am particularly fearful of earthquakes, flood, tsunamis or the like but I am afraid of not being prepared for them. Not being prepared for whatever seems to be a biggy. That is where good list making is important.
4. Small, tight spaces are mighty fearful to me. Will not/cannot/do not even watch a movie where small, tight places play a part in the plot of the movie.
5. If I were to be totally honest I would say I have some self-absorbed fears that are meaningless in the grand scheme of things...fears like being ignored, scorned; fears of people, committees, groups and a strong fear of myself sometimes. But as I said, in the grand scheme of things, these are just self-absorbed nonsense.
For those who know me well you may have some idea of something I am fearful of that I have not confessed to and that is fine. Some things are better not aired!
Over the last years I have learned that what I fear at 4:30 in the morning when all is very dark seems to evaporate in the morning light. I have also learned that the Lord truly is my Shepherd and my Friend. He has carried me through some mighty choppy waters and He knows best. He has given me opportunity after opportunity to learn to trust Him. Over and over I have come to His feet and laid it all down. I may be a slow learner but I do know I can count on the healing love of God.
The week has come to an end.
"To be grateful for the good things that happen in our lives is easy, but to be grateful for all of our lives – the good as well as the bad, the moments of joy as well as the moments of sorrow, the successes as well as the failures, the rewards as well as the rejections – that requires hard spiritual work. Still, we are only truly grateful people when we can say thank-you to all that has brought us to the present moment. As long as we keep dividing our lives between events and people we would like to remember and those we would rather forget, we cannot claim the fullness of our beings as a gift of God to be grateful for." - Henri Nouwen
Tell me, what is your greatest fear?
At the end of this week what are you most thankful for?